Behavioural patterns-5 Shyness

SHYNESS

 

 

 

 

 

 

Parenting is raising a child with love and care at every stage. Parenting ensures a child’s health and safety … and guides a child to become a good human.

It’s not an easy task as each child is different and grows up in a different environment .Each stage in life has different challenges and the child has to be handled with care. There is no magic wand for parenting.

The parent should guide and discipline their children – yet treat and respect them as individuals .

SHYNESS

Shyness is an emotion of feeling uncomfortable , self conscious , timid or maybe insecure.  A shy person sometimes feels  shaky and breathless in an unknown gathering or any situation .They feel conscious to speak up or take part in a discussion – this does not mean they are introverts .

Why are some children shy and others not?

Children sometimes become shy as parents are over protective and do not allow the child to experience things for themselves .They become too dependent and start feeling insecure if left alone in any environment .

If parents are too dominating and give their child no scope to think for themselves , then too some kids can tend to become shy.

Sometimes it’s the child is just self conscious and a little inhibited to do things. But a Shy Child is a Normal Child there is nothing wrong with them .

Shy kids need a little extra care and acceptance so that they do not feel low and are able to manage on their own – slowly and steadily . They may not become leaders but will always be accepted in a group and will have friends. They will not grow up as loners.

 

 

 

How one can handle shyness…..

 

1.  Never label your child as being shy…this could make the child feel something is wrong with them.

 

 

 

2.Accept your child .Never make fun of him/her in front of others saying oh he/she is shy and won’t talk.

3. Try to understand . Be there with your child and make them feel secure and loved .Try to talk to them telling them its ok if they can’t mix easily or talk to others easily but also tell them if they don’t try how will they know whether they can do a task or not.

4. Remember never ever force your child to talk or recite a poem or sing in front of anyone if he/she is not ready .This would make the child anxious and add to his/her fear of a similar situation.

5. Give your child opportunities to talk , do things by him or herself .. try not to leave them alone , gently pushing them to do things by themselves and accepting them if they can’t .Never make a child feel they have disappointed you.

Shyness is not an illness. Remember everyone is different but everyone is good at something and that could be listening also. So be a proud parent if your child is quiet and is a listener.

So dear parents don’t get upset if your child cannot be a leader or take part in discussions. As parents we have to accept our kids as they are and help and guide them at all stages of their lives – to put in their very best.

Learn to be proud and happy with what your kids do.

Shy Kids are normal kids accept them as they are but guide and help them to get our shyness slowly and become independent individuals.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thought for the Day………Learn to Appreciate.

”       When you see something beautiful in someone tell them.

It will take you a second to say , but could last a lifetime for them. ”

 

Never hesitate to appreciate someone if you like something about them.

Remember how happy or proud you feel if someone says something nice about you.

Its not always easy to say something good about anyone. Often your ego stops you and you don’t say what you would like to say.

Be generous with your appreciation .This will boost someone’s self esteem and make their day a happy one.

 

             

Don’t ever give up—Give It A Try

“It’s impossible”, said    Pride.

“It’s risky”, said  Experience.

‘It’s pointless”, said  Reason.

“Give it a Try’, said  the  Heart.

Unknown

Remember if you don’t try you will never know what you will have missed.

It doesn’t matter if you can’t achieve your goal. What is important is the journey and what you learn on the way.

 

 

Importance of Self Esteem-2

                                   High and Low Self Esteem

To be Happy and Successful in Life, it is very important for everyone to think and feel good about one-self.One should have the confidence that they are capable of doing things to the best of their ability.This means every one should have Self Esteem.

A Child with High Self Esteem feels :-

…Loved

…Capable

…Secure

…Happy

…Confident and willing to try new things.

 

A Child with Low Self Esteem feels :-

…Unloved

…Afraid to try new things

…Helpless to do a task alone

…Fearful of situations

…Sad and dejected

 

 

Some of the things we can do to help build Self Esteem in our children.

LOVE :- Show love unconditionally to your child.We don’t have to say I love you, only when he/she does well.Say it anytime to make them feel secure.

STRESS:- Encourage your child to take up new challenges.Make him/her feel comfortable and let them know that you are there to guide them , if they get stuck.

If there are tough decisions to be made ,sit and talk with your child about various options,and,you can decide what to do, together.

Do not expect perfection.Praise them,compliment them- even if you feel that the task which they have accomplished is not good enough.This will encourage the child,and never make him/her feel that they have  disappointed you.

All critical comments should be constructive.Every child is good at something ,make sure to comment on this unique talent.It could be even just -listening.

RESPONSIBILITY:- Give your child every chance where he/she can learn to be responsible.  Praise what he/she does,make him/her feel capable and boost his/her Self Esteem.You can,however, suggest to him/her ways for further improvement.

COMMUNICATION:- Self Esteem can be built by having good relationships with family and friends and keeping a regular dialogue , tell them so,and later when you are free -remember to ask what they wanted to show you.

Learn to listen to your child.This makes him/her feel important.Show him/her  that you are interested in all he does by asking simple questions like…”how was your day at home or in school..What they ate or whether they went outside to play.”

RESPECT:- Self Esteem can be built by respecting your child’s….Choices,Opinions and the things he has ,it could be a stone or leaf he picks up.Remember-just like you feel your things are important ,so are the things they have.

GOALS:-You can help your child to make up his/her mind about their goals-daily,weekly or monthly.You can help them to achieve their goals by following up  on a regular basis.This would be a good Self Esteem booster.

Where as,it is  important to boost your child’s Self Esteem ,it is also equally important to guide and correct him/her- at the right time .It is also necessary to discipline him/her gently- yet firmly.Never ever do this in front of others-this would embarrass your child.

PEARL OF WISDOM:

 

Self Esteem Shapes Life !!!

 

 

 

Importance of Self Esteem—1

                                    SELF ESTEEM

Self Esteem is the way we think and feel about ourselves.Self esteem shapes our lives and is important for everyone,both young and old.As parents it is important to help build up our child’s self esteem.Family and Home are two greatest influences to help children at all ages to build up a High Self Esteem.I read a beautiful poem….

I Am Glad to be Me

The author is unknown to me:

I look in the mirror

And what do I see?                              

I see the ME,

No one else can be.

I am Precious.

I am glad to be ME.

MY hair,my face.

My personality.

My size,my shape.                                                                                    

The colour of my skin.

All make up me

Outside and in.

I Am Glad to be me.

 

 

 

MY PEARLS OF WISDOM……

My Recipe for Self Esteem

 

1…I will always be …Proud to be me.

2…I Believe in myself.

3…I will love myself first.

4…I am important.

5…I am Happy with all of ME.

Kids lets have a little fun.You enjoy colouring and sticking right? (Art and Craft)

Here’s a chart which says “All About Me”

You can print it out. Then you can draw, colour, paint or stick ,following the instructions.

When you have finished stick it on your board.Remember  You are  the Best.Always be Proud of Yourself. Now this doesn’t mean you look down on others.Be happy for  what others can do.Everyone is good at something.

 

 

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