Author Archives: Abha Maheshwary

Behavioural Pattern 5—–Disciplining

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Should you discipline  children ?

Children are individuals in their own right. They grow fast during their first five years and are eager to experiment and explore things around them.They learn by observing and imitating .They are small and everything is new to them and so they need our guidance to understand wrong and right.They need to be gently instructed to follow a particular way of behaviour.They need  guidelines to differentiate  right from wrong. They need guidance to learn acceptable social behaviour and build morals and a value system to develop self discipline throughout their lives. This could be defined as disciplining a child.

Believe me, children like to be disciplined. Often when things become too much for them to handle they get confused and get out of control.It is then that they need our help. We should remember –  we don’t train children….that’s for puppies.We need to give them full attention and caring for their needs. We should be there for them to understand somethings are not correct. Disciplining does not mean punishing or ridiculing a child.He /she needs to be gently explained why an action is not acceptable .

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aPicture 1 : What can happen if you don’t exercise discipline. Patience is the way to make kids understand -it takes time and consistence effort.Needless to say, the reward is phenomenal. Like I always say ,there is no magic formula…you have to test and find out what works best for you in different situations.

Some ways that can be used to discipline :-

  1. At all times we should be aware of the child’s needs and pay attention to them.Remember the child is experiencing new things,many times things for the first time – we have to help them to make choices , eg : How to use a book ,to put away things like .toys and not to destroy them……..
  2. Limits can be set on what is acceptable behaviour and should be followed not to confuse the child.One must be gentle yet firm at all times: – eg. Eating food sitting in one place….cleaning up after play….. TV watching only at a given time….
  3. Never ridicule a child in front of others.This can lower his / her self esteem and sometimes kids may react, and turn out to be more aggressive and bold to hide their embarassment.
  4. Don’t give into tantrums .If you do, kids will know how to get what they want at all times .
  5. Be gentle yet firm telling them you mean business.Try to use encouraging words .
  6. Last but not the least ,  set an example. like don’t waste food….. sit and eat ,chew your food…clean up….

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Don’t respond to tantrums …….reason out—-

For a more effective way to discipline children ,they  must understand that if an action  is not acceptable , they will have to face the outcome 0r the  consequences.

Natural Cnsequences:- The child learns by his own deeds. He /she will have to be monitored –or else the child could get a ” I don’t care “attitude.some examples :- Forgetting lunch box …goes hungry so he /she will remember to take his tiffin.

Sleeps till late…. misses school bus..

Leaves or destroys his toys…. won’t have toys to play…

Here the child may be too young so he has to be reasoned with.

Logical Consequences :- The child is explained  that every time he does an action which not acceptable –  he will have to face the result….example

Wasting food….. no favourite dish next time………Toys not put away ……cannot go out to play with friends……

Other ways of disciplining :-

Distracting the child from the activity eg…If he /she is standing  on his /her toys one can give  balls  to throw  and so engage the child in another activity…….If the child is throwing a tantrum one can  start singing a fun song….”5 liitle monkeys”…..

it is important to remember that children get easily distracted so instead of yelling or scolding ,one can change the focus to another activity.

Instead of always being negative with no and don’t –we can  say ‘lets see if this works ” in a voice that the child feels confident about.

It is important to remember that everything that happens to a child from the time he is born leaves an impression on him /her.Every experience plays a part in forming the child’s character.As adults it is  our duty to guide the child and discipline him /her so that he /she grows up with a good value system.

One has to find a way that suits one and is most effective.

Punishing is a NO, NO

Reward is nice but should not become a habit or the child will do things only for the reward.

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Something to Think About

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” When you think everything is someone else’s fault , you will suffer a lot.When you realize that  everything springs only from you ,you will learn both peace and joy. ”

Dalai Lama

Today I am only going to say that whenever you come across some nice quotation learn to share it. You never know what someone is going through and how a quotation can help to over come the situation and look at life in a positive way.

You and you alone are responsible for all that is happening to you.

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Save water

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water

WATER :    Can you imagine a world without water.

What do we need water for :- Bathing , washing ,cooking, drinking…….Water is our life.

cleaning    washing water  brush                  water plant

shave            car wash   drink h2o

We have all learnt about the water cycle :-

h2o cycle

Like we take so many things for granted we never think about water. We use it and enjoy.Not even for a minute do we stop and think what would we do if one morning we get up and our taps are dry.

Today let us think of ways we can save water or rather use water carefully :drinku

Here is how you can make a checklist for saving water :-

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Water is a precious gift from God .

Let us save every drop.

Be grateful first and pray for a good rainy season next year.

 

 

Earth Day

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The Earth Day is round the corner……Yes it is celebrated on the 22nd of April every year.On that day every one will be talking about saving our planet  -Earth-. There will be workshops where we will all join hands and promise to take care of our planet.That is really nice  , but the only problem I see is that as the days and months go by we slowly forget and begin to take things for granted ….. the air around us , water the trees and every thing else. The good thing is that there are people who keep reminding us. A big thank you to them. I am just going to put up some pictures from the net. Children lets all try in our own little way to make our world beautiful. So cheers to that.

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What happened is done

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What happened is done.

Stop giving time to things from your past , which no longer exist ,when there is joy to be found right in front of you.

Karen Salmansohn

If we keep remembering  about things that happened to us we will never be able to move ahead. What we have to do is learn from our past incidents and look ahead with an open mind. If we keep remembering things then it is  we alone who will be the suffers .Our minds and thoughts will always be clustered. Look ahead there is always another door open .We have to learn to be positive.Its not easy so we have to keep reminding ourselves to move on every time we tend to think back and it worries us.

There is a new joy and adventure always in looking ahead.’ Time and Tide wait for no man.’ So always move on to a better future.

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