Feelings and emotions are very important factors in the process of growing up.Emotions are a combination of physical and metal states.Environment plays a very important part that affects emotions.Children can be happy, sad , aggressive, exited, jealous ……..We as parents and teachers must not try to suppress the child’s feeling. We should try to understand why the child is behaving in a particular way.We should never think the child to be bad or think these are moral issues.We have to work patiently and with love.
. Never ridicule a child.
. Always maintain your calm.
. Be patient and loving .The child should never feel he is not liked.
. Never single out a child in a group.Always take him aside and talk so the he is not embarassed.
. There is no magic word or method you can use to bring up your child into a perfect person.
. The child should always feel safe and secure.
. Last of all set rules which you must abide to so that the child understands he cannot take advantage.
Children start throwing tantrum by 2/3 years. At this age the kids are kings of their universe.Their parents almost always like to fulfill their whims and fancies ,little realizing that they are spoiling them.As kids grow they realise that throwing tantrums becomes a way of asserting themselves when their desires are not met.
Avoiding tantrums entirely is not possible. Gentle yet firm handling can help .Simple rules can be set and they must be followed.Each child is different so one cannot generalise disciplinary rules. Many a time one of the best way is to ignore the tantrum and give no special attention -after a while the child may resume his play.Parenting is not easy.It is all about love and patience.
Here are some children in a nasty mood hoping their demands will be fulfilled.They try all kinds of ways.Have a look at the pictures bellow.
Children are very smart they know what to do so that you fulfill their demands.
Here are a few things that can help you discipline your child and also keep tantrums under control.Remember like i said earlier there is one one thing you can do which works with kids- No fairy wand works every time.There is no magic to discipline.-
– Do not give into all demands espeically the unrealistic ones.Learn to draw a line. Only you will know when- its your child.
– Be calm and confident while handling the child during a tantrum.Never feel guilty, be firm yet gentle.
– Set rules and be consistent.Kids know your weakness.Aggressive behaviour should be best avoided with silence and disapproval.Let the child calm down before you start a dialogue.
– Be a good role model. Do not scream and throw tantrums in front of your child however angry you are.
– Give positive attention and reinforce positive behaviour.
Many times tantrums set in due to frustration or lack of attention.Remember a tantrum does not reflect on your upbringing.
Do not try to analyse every action of your child. You are his teacher -he has to learn right and wrong and learn to make his decisions as he grows.
In the next few posts I shall write about some behaviour patterns which every parent gets concerned about.
Relax you are doing a good job bringing up your child. Always have faith in yourself.