What is self esteem ? Well it is the way  we feel and think about ourselves. It is a feel good factor and it helps shape up our lives at all stages.

I read a lovely poem which says very simply what we should make kids feel.

Be happy with what they have and say -” I am proud to be me.”

I Am Special

Hands to help with,eyes to see,

I’m so happy with all of me.

Ears to hear with ,and feet so free,

I’m so happy with all of me.

Nose to smell with,legs to climb a tree,

I’m so happy with all of me.

I am growing big as you can see,

I’m very happy with all of me.

( A.C. Educational Research Team…….Frank Bros.&Co. )boygirl

Kids go through different stages as they grow and their self esteem has phases of ups and downs.

Toddlers :- They like to explore and feel . They tend to show self -confidence.We need to let them be , while having a watchful eye just to make sure all is well. Let them feel and learn , making sure the environment is child friendly.Avoid the word DON’T as far as possible.We may break their confidence.

toddler         toddler1

todder3  toddler2


School Age Children :- School kids are learning to do things on their own.They may sometimes become unsure ,we need to encourage them to keep trying and help their self esteem to grow. Push gently and help them to achieve the task .Be a patient guide.

kids unsure      kids unsure3

As kids grow they feel the challenge of independence.Their look matters to them and peer acceptance becomes important. A guiding gentle hand will always help.Children should always feel secure and wanted.

High self esteem :-The child usually feel –

secure, loved ,willing to try new things and feels capable and responsible.

hish esteem


Low Self Esteem :- The child usually feels –

Helpless, unloved and insecure,afraid to try new things and fears others.sometimes he /she is a loner.

low         low1


low2 kids unsure

kids unsure3


What can we as parents ,teachers and guides do to help our children have a high self esteem :-

1. Love is the biggest thing to shower on kids. Show them you are happy and proud of them for all they do – even if they are not the best.- We should not assume they know that we love them.We should show our love every day, hug them make them feel accepted and secure , come what may.

2. We should praise and encourage them – but be careful not to overdo.- Show appreciation sincerely ,be specific .Do not hesitate to tell them how to improve. Kids like that and work towards that. Our comments must not be critical but supportive and constructive.

3.  Encourage them to be responsible at home with friends and  everything around. This will make them feel capable of managing situations. Children like discipline.

4.  Respect your child. Listen and communicate with them showing keen interest, sometimes spending time with them alone. Respect their point of view and don’t be too judgemental.

5.  Teach them sound values of honesty,hard work, caring,respecting and most of all to be grateful for all they have. This will make them  happy and satisfied .

Spend  quality time with your child.They need your love , guidance and patience to grow into confident,happy and good human beings.

Another few lines to remember :-

I am beautiful and wonderful,

I am happy with all of me.

I am special, there is no one around  just like me.

I thank You God for making me.

( A.C. educational Research Team.     Frank Bros.&Co.)


Kids , you can feel low or sad sometimes – it is absolutely normal.Mums and Dads please don’t analyse every action of your child. It is good to realise your kids too need a little space however big or small they may be.

Parents,you are the single greatest influence on your child’s self esteem.

Pearls of Wisdom :-

Love without condition.

Do not be judgemental.

Learn to communicate to have good relationships.





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