Behaviour Pattern 3

Telling falsehoods -Lying

lie1 Telling falsehoods or lying is also a normal part of growing up. It is not a moral issue and if not handled delicately and with patience it could become a habit.Children are smart and can understand so it is important to help them appreciate and understand the value of truth. Stories always help – Here’s one we have all enjoyed listening to when we were kids -we also learnt about not telling lies :-

boy and sheep

Ofcourse like I have mentioned there is no magic method that can help you bringing up your kids without facing difficult situations -“falsehoods” being one .Love and patience is your best tool.

A little note on why children lie and some dos and don’ts:-

 

Young children are often confused about facts.They are full of curiosity and like to listen to adult talk. Sometimes they like to participate in adult conversations ( if encouraged by them.) making themselves there in situations being talked about.- making up large tales.

Children when very young don’t know the difference between the real and unreal.

.  They like to rehearse or retell a story they have heard….”I have a red noddy car…..

.  To avoid punishment they smartly make up tales.

.  If parents are too strict children learn to be untrue   because they are scared of the outcome or they may make up and say things which they think would please their parents.-Untrue stories-

.  Too many don’ts and restrictions may make the child do wrong things and then make up tales to get away.

.  Sometimes they just like to repeat adult conversations they have heard making  themselves in that situation -” Oh today I handled a huge elephant.”

.  To get attention of their teacher they may tell untrue things -” I Have a horse at home.” It could become a habit -so just avoid with a smile.

.  Many a times they like to do exactly like their friends -” I too am going to America.”

.  Untrue statements sometimes makes kids feel they may be looked up to.

Telling falsehoods are childish misdeeds.Children are innocent and if one questions them gently they will be honest. We should never ridicule them in front of other kids.Always correct them and explain why it is not nice to tell untrue tales.

We as adults/parents should handle such situations with maturity and patience.Be strict yet gentle.

lie1  Speak to the child when he/ she is alone telling him /her you won’t punish if tells the truth.Try to find out why he/she was not honest ,that will help you to understand  the situation  and so handle it the correct way.

lie2  You can make the situation a little fun and pass your message of being truthful.

lie ” Who stole the cookie?” Explain to the child that if he/she asks for something is always nicer than taking something quietly and then when questioned to lie .

Words may lie but actions will always tell the truth. So handle gently.Wrong procedures may make the telling of untruths a habit.

Pearl of Wisdom :-

Truth always prevails.

Don’t be scared – Stand up for the truth.

 

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